Lyme decisions

I've decided to stop my antibiotics. I do so much better off them then on. I feel that the benefits of the drugs no longer outweigh the side effects. My specialist is going to be livid.

My specialist, a passionate and knowledgeable individual who I respect, is of the opinion that antibiotics are the keystone necessary to destroy the infection. This is augmented by herbs and supplements that reduce symptoms and ready the body's defence system. I think that this has a lot of merit. I don't have the training or the drive that my specialist has, but I do know how my body is responding.

I'll come clean with my specialist at my appointment next month. I want to make certain I understand my reasons for this step. The argument my specialist gives against is that going off the drugs too soon will lead to antibiotic resistance. But it's been a year and a half on heavy drugs... isn't it time to find out if the infection still has it's hold on me?

Hopefully my specialist will understand and give me the information I need to make the next step.

At the moment there is no way to tell for certain whether the infection still has a strangle hold on me. There is no accurate testing so we have to judge this on the basis of how I respond to treatment. Antibiotics did help. I'm confident I wouldn't be alive without them. But maybe the infection is gone and all that remains are symptoms of my body getting back to normal.

Quite probably, many of my symptoms are permanent damage from the Lyme, or separate ailments that have been made stronger by my weakened sate. In that case, any further antibiotics would be futile and possibly harmful.

Maybe the infection has gone into hiding. Maybe my body is now strong enough on it's own to keep the bacteria at an acceptable level. If this is so, then I can recover and maintain my health by controlling my diet, stress and environment and by exercising. If I live a healthy life then I should be able to manage - if this is the case. Of course, this would also leave me susceptible to future illness not to mention a major relapse if the bacteria are allowed to thrive again.

Maybe, I've done all I can to target the cause of the illness (Lyme) and what I need to do now is to focus on the symptoms. If I can make myself a functioning member of the community again, then maybe I will have the resources and motivation to improve more aspects of my health.

The thing is, I just don't know. That's the hardest part. Not knowing.

There is insufficient evidence to support any action I take next. Even my GP is loath to suggest one.

My GP does support me stopping the antibiotics. Dr. GP shares the opinion that they are no longer befitting me. My GP is supportive of trying different options, but cannot advise me what to do. As a medical doctor there is not enough evidence to suggest one course of action over another. So, my GP says that when choosing what to do next, start with things that do no known harm. I just have to be sure to keep my GP in the loop. (yes, I know the structure of this paragraph is awkward - I wanted to avoid using any gender pronouns)

I'm going to take even more control of my healing. In the past I've felt bullied and pressured into trying different healing strategies. Usually without understanding them fully. My current GP is about the only medical professional who has taken the time to outline the risks and benefits of each procedure. Consequently, I have a tremendous amount of respect for my GP. Others haven't been so diligent.

I'm going to be even stronger when dealing with people who are going to help my health. I've been told that I can be a real bitch when dealing with medical personal that I don't respect.

There has even been yelling. Still, I feel I need to be stronger with these people. I'm tired of being confused.